Duh Driving Tip of the Week

Posted by Motorista on June 18, 2013 in Badinage, Driving, Dubious | 3 Comments

Dearest readers,

Although no one has asked, I feel the need to occasionally impart words of wisdom regarding various aspects of driving.  I refer to these as Duh Driving Tips because, really, you should not need me to point these things out.  They should be intuitive.  However, it would appear that drivers in my neck of the woods lack the intuitive-ness gene.  Therefore, I present…Duh Driving Tips.

Today’s topic: merging onto the interstate (or other freeway, highway or byway).  Imagine this scenario, which I experience at least three to four times in any given work week (sometimes in any given day): vehicle putters down access road, traveling at approximately 45-50 miles per hour. (Note – this alone is enough to raise Motorista’s blood pressure.  However, we cannot include every stupid-ass driving behavior in one Duh Driving Tip.  Driving significantly under the speed limit must wait for its own day.)  Vehicle approaches entrance ramp at, again, 45-50 miles per hour.  Vehicle travels length of entrance ramp at 45-50 miles per hour.  Vehicle begins merge into 70-80 mile-per-hour traffic, and, by merge, I mean vehicle continues at same speed – oh, wait! now we’re at 60! – until it runs out of merging lane.  Better hope that 80-mile-per-hour traffic was paying attention and magically made room for you.  And, hey, did you notice the red MINI behind you, with that driver yelling, “Ohmygodwe’reallgoingtodierightnowbecausethat18-wheelerisalotbiggerthanmeohforgodssakehurryupalready!”?  That was me.

I do applaud your increase in speed to 65 miles per hour once you created your magic bubble of personal space on the interstate.

Conclusion: please increase your speed, preferably to match that of your fellow travelers, by the time you begin merging onto whatever death trap roadway you are entering.

Love,

Motorista